In the recent Religion Saves: and Nine Other Misconceptions, Pastor Mark Driscoll answers a question about dating. I thought these following questions to ask yourself in regards to dating were helpful. Download the audio or video here. While some of the questions I wouldn’t 1000% condone, I thought it gave at least a good general outline of things you should be considering and asking.
Christian Dating Principles for Both Men and Women
1. Maximize your singleness for God.
2. Do not pursue a relationship until you are ready to marry.
3. Be reasonable – do not set your expectations too high or too low.
4. A date is not dating: date = time together; dating = couple (1 Tim. 5:1-2).
5. Never go on a date or date a non-Christian (2 Cor. 6:14).
6. Only date one person at a time.
7. He initiates; she responds.
8. Look at who God puts in front of you (e.g. Boaz & Ruth).
9. Feel free to use technology (e.g. internet dating) wisely.
10. Only invest in a relationship with someone who you are attracted to entirely (e.g. physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, ministry gifts).
11. Only date someone who agrees with you on gender and family.
12. Guard your heart (Prov. 4:23).
Christian Dating Questions for Men
1. Are you overlooking good women (e.g. single moms, shy, divorcees)?
2. Are you honoring, God, her, her family, her friends, etc.?
3. Is she modest (1 Tim. 2:9)?
4. Will she follow your leadership?
5. Does she have noble character (Prov. 31)?
6. Can you provide for the lifestyle she expects (1 Tim. 5:8)?
7. Is she like the worst women in Proverbs (e.g. nag, loud, quarreling, unfaithful)?
8. Do you want your daughters to be like her and your sons to marry someone like her?
Christian Dating Questions for Women
1. Do you want to help him and join his course of life (Gen. 2:18; 1 Cor. 11:9)?
2. Is he tough enough to remain strong in tough times (2 Tim. 2:3)?
3. Will he take responsibility for you and your children (1 Cor. 11:3)?
4. Is he considerate and gentle with you (1 Peter 3:7)?
5. Will he be a good father (Ps. 127:3-5; Eph. 6:4)?
6. Is he a one woman man (1 Tim. 3:2)?
7. How valuable are you to him?
8. Do you want your sons to be like him and your daughters to marry someone like him?
I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Allen Taylor
Out of curiosity, “11. Only date someone who agrees with you on gender and family.”
What exactly does this mean? Could you elaborate?
Well, these aren’t my words, they’re from Mark Driscoll’s sermon on Dating (click the link in the post to get to it).
but what i think he means by that is simply that you want to begin dating someone that shares a similar view of gender and family issues. i would sound off on that by saying it’s important to share a similar theology as the person you intend to marry. because if you totally disagree on how you ought to raise your children or can’t agree on the role of a woman and man in a relationship, then there’s going to be inevitable divisions.
good and hardworking wife is a gift to GOD
characteristics
inteligence
wisdom
knowlegable
singer
creatafity
wise
these is agood issue
thank you